Do what you're supposed to do!

If I could talk to all of my young Brothers to explain to them about this journey called manhood, I would warn them of the perils and the pitfalls. I would tell them it is the single most difficult task that they will ever face. I would tell my young soldiers--I like to call them soldiers--that they can do it because millions of others have faced this very daunting journey and completed it successfully. But the real challenge that faces young soldiers are the myths, the things that shine like gold mad sparkle like diamonds--the illusions, the things that appear to be real but are not even there at all.

We have a few myths that sound great, but when put in the wrong context, they take on a meaning that can lead us down the wrong path. Here is one of the myths many of you have heard: "I gotta do what I gotta do." Now that sounds like a manly statement, right? Well, taken in the wrong context, it is like taking a pill for the wrong reason. You don't take an aspirin if your breath stinks!

This thought about "I gotta do what I gotta do" is not only limited to the younger Brothers who might listen to a certain kind of music and choose to wear oversized pants and jackets; there are some older guys who think the same way. Some of the guys--young and old--use the slogan "I gotta do what I gotta do" to justify selling dope, or to justify retaliating against someone, or to justify dropping out of school because he needs quick money.

When you justify a statement without the proper guidance, it's the same as taking a pill without reading the label. Sometimes you get it wrong. This myth of "I gotta do what I gotta do" has been misused in our community, many times to the detriment of our young Brothers. See, here's what the label should say: "When doing what you gotta do, do it to generate a totally positive outcome."

See, this "I gotta do what I gotta do" mentality came about after a group of men who were not successful, who had failed to live up to the truths about manhood, got together and started justifying their actions. Primarily, they failed to follow one of the major truths about manhood--"A man's gotta do what a man's supposed to do." Oh, it almost sounds the slogan I've been talking about, but it's not. See, if a man does what he's supposed to do, he oftentimes won't be forced to do what he's gotta do. Let me repeat that: If a man does what he's supposed to do, he won't be forced into what he's gotta do.

See, you're supposed to value life, not just yours, but other lives as well. Then when someone disrespects you, your reaction will never be "I gotta do what I gotta do," perhaps gunning someone down because that's the only way you think you have to react.

Then there are those of you who convince yourselves that you have to drop out of school to get your hands on the Benjamins. Someone should have told you that the way to get more money is to do what you're supposed to do, and that is to stay in school because people who get an education usually make more money than those who don't. So when you decide to stay in school--the thing you're supposed to do--you're traveling on the road to success. If you stay in school, you have the opportunity to prepare yourself for many other options that are much better than the "I gotta do what I gotta do" choice of selling dope. Again, do what you're supposed to do!

So I'd tell young Brothers what real men do. If I could, I would destroy as many myths as possible, but I can't because this is just a column in a magazine, and I'm out of paper on the plane. I gotta work like I'm supposed to do.

By STEVE HARVEY, actor, comedian, nationally syndicated radio host

www.steveharvey.com

COPYRIGHT 2007 Johnson Publishing Co.
COPYRIGHT 2008 Gale, Cengage Learning