What are you proud of?

WHAT are you proud of? I mean what are you really proud of? Is it your car? Your crib? The clothes that you wear? The lady on your arm? The watch on your wrist? The group of Brothers you hang with?

Now imagine if all of that stuff were gone. It's only you. Now, what are you proud of? Are you just as proud of yourself, the ac complishments that you have achieved, the values that you hold, the man you have become?

I ask because I would venture to say that some of us would be hard pressed to find a sense of pride in anything other than material things we own and the people we know. How do I know? Because I see daily examples of Brothers who don't know their history, don't appreciate their women, don't respect themselves. They have very little direction or purpose in their lives, relying on the opinions of others to get them through.

Dogged by stereotypes and low expectations, a true sense of self-pride can be hard to come by if you are a Black man in America. Back in the day, people called it "backbone." You could be the brokest Brother on the block, but if you had backbone, if you had inner pride, you were respected.

A truly and independent emotion, pride comes from deep inside of you. In fact, pride is probably one of the deepest feelings a person can have, and perhaps the most important. Once it takes root in you, no one or nothing can take it away from you. Not your boss, your lady, not even the number of zeros you have in your bank account.

Once it takes root, pride will make you open the door for a lady, even when your boys think it's lame. Pride will make you forgo that new sports car in order to have the money to enroll in classes at the community college. Pride will make you respect your elders, respect authority, respect your lady and respect yourself. A proud Brother will stay the course when others stray. A proud Brother will do things, not because it's the latest fad or is politically correct, but because it's right.

I can still vividly recall growing up in Greenville, S.C., and hearing my father's voice. He wasn't loud or angry, just stern and persistent. He used to always tell me to hold my head up, stand up tall, and look him (or any adult for that matter) in the eye when speaking to them. He knew back then what I know now--that pride can motivate you to be your best, to set goals for yourself, and know that you can achieve them.

So strong is pride that it carried an entire generation of Blacks through the Jim Crow era and into another era where we truly felt good about who we were. The phrase "I'm Black and I'm proud," was not only catchy, it was uplifting, to the point that no discriminatory laws or racist people could hold us down.

But the whole notion of pride that James Brown sang about and Martin and Malcolm preached about has been construed and misconstrued and misrepresented so much that it has become virtually unrecognizable. Pride is not about how many worldly possessions you own, how powerful you are or how good you look. It's about how you handle yourself.

It starts with taking pride in yourself even before you know what it is that you are truly proud of. It starts by being a little humble, while at the same time holding your head up. All the while realizing that when you take pride in yourself, good things happen.

Only when you have a sense of inner pride will you have the backbone to stand alone and find a myriad of things that you are indeed proud of.

COPYRIGHT 2005 Johnson Publishing Co.
COPYRIGHT 2005 Gale Group